i'd like to lodge a formal complaint with the universe. 2010 has been really, really lousy thus far.
honestly, this is the hardest life has ever been for me. there have been scarier times. there have been lonelier times. there have been poorer times. but nothing has been this personally difficult.
a dear friend of mine just said, "With the weight of the world on her shoulders you would never hear a complaint from Anna Montgomery.......
(on the contrary, she would be trying to do something for you or for someone else!)." God bless her, that is very, very true. usually. today, i decided...i want to complain (for once...and very very loudly) THIS SUCKS. A LOT.
i am tired of shouldering it all. i am tired of hearing all the whining around me. i am weary of pleading. i am worn out from the worry. i am sick of taking the higher ground. i am SO over this year. and only 8 months to go.
since January, i have been single-parenting more often than not. i have been bullied professionally (yeah, BULLIED...you know who you are), i have been made to feel unsafe in my home and online, i have been ignored by medical professionals, i have been terrified of losing my daughter to some unnamed disease that is slowly eating her alive, i have been insulted by *customers* who are not-so-subtly doing the bidding of someone else, i have been afraid that i am not strong enough to bear this alone...and i am angry at having to do so.
i am working 20 hour days...and barely putting a dent in all the stuff piled on my *to-do* list. i am exhausted.
and just when i think things are manageable, my cats slaughter 6 baby bunnies in my backyard.
so there you have it. my formal complaint. please, please, please, universe, i need something wonderful right about now.